There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
