her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
FUCK WHALES
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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