I just made out with a guy for $7.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
you never un-have a 4some
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
