is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
