Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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