Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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