Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
as a side note pls kill me
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
