we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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