i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
