Will you blow on my dice?
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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