He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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