when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
