I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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