DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
