can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
