you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
We left an ass print on the piano.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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