i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
