Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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