well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
