Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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