He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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