dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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