I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
