He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
did i just pee glitter
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
