remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize