Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I forgot wine drunk hurts
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
