i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
