Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
How's work?
Spinning.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
