I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Randomize
