It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
