i already hear my dad disowning me
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The air was thick with penises
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
