So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
