Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Need sex. Gaining weight.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
