He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
this will be a night to untag.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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