Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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