you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
pray to the hookup gods
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
