she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
