; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
my being single is dangerous.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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