Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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