I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
