Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize
