I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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