i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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