At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
