There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
