why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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