ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
