Do vagina's smell?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
