i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
