Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize